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January 3, 2009
â€“ Larry Goodman
Opening with a graphic informing us that the following episode documented what took place at Christmas Chaos.
Fresh off his turn to the dark side, Steve-O was the first in a series of color commentators to join Jason James on commentary.
1 -- BIG BULLY DOUGLAS vs. SLADE
Slade was a big, bearded bald guy. Ugly as sin. He could do no wrong according to the warped and occasionally delusional brain of O.
James was hot at O for turning on Hayes. Bully hulked up. Slade begged off and use the tights to toss Bully through the ropes. They
brawled on the outside until Mark Owens counted them out. Bully slid into the ring just as Owens was waving off the match. Slade tried to
back jump Bully and got sent packing by a high boot.
Winner: None. Ruled as a double count out at 7:17. Dead crowd. The action sucked. At least in the ring with Slade, Douglas looked like
One of their major sponsors is â€œFree at Lastâ€� bail bonding with Jimmy Hart as the spokesperson. I try not to think about what that
says about Main Eventâ€™ viewing audience.
2 â€“ â€œColossalâ€� CHRIS CAIN (with Dyron Flynn) vs. LARRY COOTER
NWA Mid-America TV Champion Shane Smalls on color. Cooter dominated early. He bounced Cainâ€™s head off the ring apron on all
four sides. Flynn and Cain were both wearing kelly green. James called them the Lucky Charms. Cain avoided a mad charge, caught
Cooter with a Russian legsweep, and started kicking the **** out of him. Cain danced a little jig. Flynn interfered. Cooter hit a forward
Russian legsweep, but Cain got a foot over the ropes. Cooter tried to get the crowd behind him. Not happening. Cain hit a buzzsaw kick
to the mouth followed by a leg lariat. Cooter barely kicked out of the pin. But Cain took a banana peel slip when Cooter avoided one of his
kicks. Comeback time. Cooter pulled the strap down but missed with the Lawler fist drop. Flynn got up on the apron. Cooter tried to send
Cain into Flynn. Cain put on the breaks and Cooter rolled him for the three count.
Winner: Cooter in 9:45. Better than it figured to be. Cainâ€™s hellishly stiff kicks were the highlight of the match. It helped that Cooter
sold them huge. The crowd never really got behind Cooter as a face though.
Cain locked in the Cloverleaf submission on Cooter while Flynn taunted him.
I should mention that a major sponsor of this show is â€œFree at Lastâ€� bail bonding with Jimmy Hart as their spokesperson. I try not
to think about what that says about Main Eventâ€™ viewing audience.
3 â€“ NWA Mid-America Heavyweight Champion â€œPlayboyâ€� SCOTT HAVES & â€œDangerousâ€� DOUG GILBERT vs. JEFF
DANIELS & STEVE-O (with Dominique)
Cain out on color playing up his Irish heritage. James made fun of his semi-midget stature. Daniels didnâ€™t want to mix it up with
Gilbert in the first place, and had no luck at all when he finally did. Dominique was, as usual, highly active. A fan got in her face. James
said Nashville had some of the meanest, rudest fans in the world. The faces worked over Oâ€™s arm. James brought up Oâ€™s hair
loss again. At 9:00, Hayes went flying into the post after O stepped aside. All kinds of heel shenanigans behind the back of ref Jamie
Ferrari â€“ babyface visual falls, double teams, switches without tagging, a missed legal tag by Hayes. O locked in a sleeper. Meanwhile,
Gilbert was giving Daniels a beating outside the ring. Daniels bled. Hayes hit a flying forearm to spark his comeback. Hayes set O up for
a tornado DDT. Dominque started pummeling Hayes. He hauled her into the ring, but was hesitant to hit her. Dominique tossed brass
knucks to O, who put Hayes lights out.
Winners: Daniels & Steve-O in 17:00. Honest to God heat, a rarity on NWA ME TV. The crowd was into Gilbert as a babyface more than I
4 â€“ NWA Mid-America Television Title Match: Champion SHANE SMALLS vs. SHAWN SHULTZ
JIP with promoter Mike Porter joining James on color. They talked about Shultz being a former Mid-America Heavyweight Champion and
his feud with Jerry Lynn over the title. Smalls got the better of the back and forth, until Shultz slipped out of a tornado DDT and leveled
Smalls with a lariat. Ref Mark Owens was sticking his ass right into the camera, and Porter went on a rant.
â€�This referee refereeâ€™s for another promotion (Tony Falkâ€™s USWO). I canâ€™t expect any more from him. They canâ€™t teach
â€˜em down on Interstate Drive how to do the refereeing and stay out of the camera. They donâ€™t even have a camera to start withâ€¦
(BLEEP)â€¦They donâ€™t have a TV show. They canâ€™t even afford a camera, so I shouldnâ€™t expect any more.â€�
Smalls kept kicking out of everything Shultz threw at him. They put Small over as a fighting champion that would not quit. Both men down
on a collision of clotheslines. Then a furious comeback by Smalls leading to a jawbreaker, but Shultz kicked out his delayed cover. Shultz
answered with a rockbottom and Smalls rolled a shoulder at 2 and Â¾. A triple whammy of ref bumps put Owens down and out. Smalls
hit the Last Rites for a visual fall. Owens finally counted two, collapsed, restarted the count, and Shultz kicked out. Shultz kicked Smalls in
the groin and pinned Smalls with a DDT.
James went crazy. â€œI cannot believe this. Shawn Shultz is the new Mid-American Television Champion and hell has just frozen over.â
€� Porter said he was taking the tape to the NWA Board of Directors.
Winner: Shultz to win the NWA Mid-America TV Title in roughly 20 minutes. They worked this match like they had a point to prove about
quality of wrestling in NWA Main Event. Lots of action. Dramatic near falls. The triple ref bump was great stuff. As good as the wrestling
was, the crowd response was only so-so. James added something with the intensity of his announcing down the stretch. What the hell
got into Porter?
Random Thoughts: Now this was a wrestling show. It wasnâ€™t all good, but it was all wrestling. Thereâ€™s something to be said for
that at a time when the norm from TNA is less than 30 minutes of wrestling during a two hour show. Itâ€™s a product that can only
appeal to a small niche audience. Even when the wrestling is good, the production quality is such that most casual fans wouldnâ€™t sit
still for it. They shot this, their big holiday show, with only one cameraâ€¦It was hard to tell with the way it was shot, but the crowd looked
to be a little over 100â€¦Clearly, the TV title is being position as the work rate title. Interesting that the TV title match went on last instead of
the tag match, which had the major storyline going in. The wrestling was better in the TV title match, but the crowd was way more into the
tag match...The Lucky Charms thing has comedic possibilities. It will be open season on Leprechaun jokesâ€¦They pushed Lawlerâ
€™s appearance in Portland on January 24 throughout the show, both with ads and insets during the matches.